Far Away

“Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and cannot remain silent” ~ Victor Hugo

There is one thing that my friend brought into my life that I had never been able to express with anyone else before and that was music. I have always loved music. I love the stories that songs tell, the emotions that they bring or the memories that they unearth in your mind and in your heart.

Sometimes an old song will come on the radio and I am transported back in time to my first "parking" experience in high school when I really thought he was just a bad driver and truly was just looking for a place to "turn around." Or I can hear some old country, "Willie, Waylon and the boys", and I am transported back to the living room of the house I grew up in where my dad would play albums.

I had always dreamed of listening to and sharing music with someone. Like being able to use music to carry on a conversation between the two of you with out ever having to mutter a word. We could do this. There were many times when an email would consist of nothing but lyrics to a song.

When we would IM, he would download songs and send them to me. I would put my headphones on and he would have me tell him when I was starting the song so that we could listen at the exact same time, together. I would close my eyes and listen to the music as I dreamed of him singing the words to me, dancing, holding me close, looking in my eyes. All the while tears forming in my eyes just because of the pure emotion I would feel at that exact moment in time.

One of the first songs we ever shared was "Far Away" by Nickelback. I bought the CD and fell in love with this group. I even went to their concert a couple of months ago. I called my friend during the concert so that I could feel him there with me and share it with him. That concert, that moment, is one I can still see in mind as clear as if I was there today. But that moment is a bittersweet memory now.